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Last week I was on my game. I had a schedule in place, dinner on the table (every night), mostly contented kids with activities throughout the day, much-needed family time. I was winning. I owe it all to daily prayer and God’s mercy and faithfulness. All-in-all, I was feeling pretty good in this time of uncertainty. With one week under my belt, the reality is now setting in. There are a bunch more weeks ahead! I know from all I’ve learned that I can do all things, big and small, through Christ’s strength. (Philippians 4:13)
So why is it that I feel this nagging feeling in my heart rising up now that won’t go away? We are safe. Our kids are doing okay. We have food on our table. We are staying healthy as best we can by social distancing. Why won’t this nagging feeling go away? Someone has said it’s the mix of mundane and emergency. The truth is they don’t mix but we are thrust into both at the same time being quarantined during this terrible pandemic. This unnatural situation creates anxiety.
I would agree that there is an element of truth in this. But I think what it’s uncovering in me is a greater reality, a greater need in my heart.
I’m finishing a book right now called Attachments by Dr. Tim Clinton and Dr. Gary Sibcy. In the section entitled Solitude I read, “Those who constantly have the gas pedal to the floor are doomed to be godless.”
Doomed to be godless. That sounds like a very barren and lonely place. Now stopped in my tracks, I have been contemplating the truth of this quote in my own life. Have I been living with my “gas pedal to the floor?”
God is inviting me to practice solitude. I might even call it a mandatory exercise.
But, Solitude is easier said than done!
Now in day 295 of quarantine….(okay I exaggerate a bit) have you found yourself irritable? Are you full of anxious thoughts? Is there unrest in you that cannot be quieted. Instead, it grows with each passing day? Perhaps it’s not boredom. Maybe it’s not fear of the pandemic.
What if it’s God’s efforts to get you alone through solitude?
I’ve noticed that the longer I am without my “familiar surroundings and usual schedule,” the more I hear my heart talking. Or, better yet, God’s voice.
Whatever the case, it’s not a comfortable place for me. In my solitude, I feel God is getting me alone on some matters of the heart. My irritability reveals my unwillingness to go there with Him.
Can you relate? In the book Attachments, the authors speak to solitude and its effect on us.
Solitude helps us strip away the almost unconscious defenses we use to soften the experience of aloneness and our fear of death. When we get away from others and from our typical daily routine, we are thrown into the reality of being completely dependent on God for existence. This can provoke some pretty stiff anxiety. But remember, it’s this anxiety, this helplessness and vulnerability, that expose our need and heighten our thirst for God, our desire to seek refuge in His peaceful sanctuary.
You see we have a problem and a resistance to the discipline of solitude.
It doesn’t take much thought to realize how easily we allow material possessions, other relationships, business, success, or even ministry to replace what we see as our need for God. Too often we find our “rest” in them, not in Him. We feel self-sufficient, perhaps like Adam and Eve felt in the Garden. When they ate the forbidden fruit they were in essence telling God, “We don’t really need You”. Which, of course, is what we’re saying when we turn toward our possessions, positions, or other people for the comfort and security that only God can provide.
Just because (solitude) may cause some discomfort don’t avoid (it). The turmoil it triggers is often necessary, like the muscular discomfort experienced when lifting weights or in the agony of childbirth.
The end result, as God slows us down, pries our fingers from lesser things, and teaches us to trust Him, to find our rest and contentment in Him, is peace.
“The more dependent we become on God the more independent we become in life.”
So our circumstances, our status, our endeavors will no longer dictate our lives.
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Is God getting you alone on a matter of the heart?
Confess it. Get real about it. Wrestle it down and identify it.
And then…
Give it to Him.
Cling to Him.
Pray to Him.
Look to Him.
Wait on Him.
Don’t give up!
Let Him have His way.
Will you be willing when He gets you alone?
Friend, let’s allow our quarantine to become solitude. Let’s wrestle away from the trappings of this world and into the arms of our Savior. He is our source and our strength.
God is our refuge and strength,
a very present help in trouble.
Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way,
though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea,
though its waters roar and foam,
though the mountains tremble at its swelling.
Be still and know that I am God.
Psalm 46:1-3, 10b
This time of quarantine is not just helpful for learning what we have taken for granted, and what has been a time waster in our lives, it may be the avenue to healing we never would’ve found otherwise.
Consider the anxiety you carry…maybe God is simply getting you alone. Let your quarantine become solitude and tarry with Him there. You will find He is all that you need, now and always.
Joanne Clement - Thank you